Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
he got up in front of the whole lecture hall and yelled that Charlie Brown's Christmas tree was his favorite book in the history of the universe. then he stumbled out the fire exit setting the alarm off. I could've jumped him right then and there.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I love that your nipples always taste like clean laundry.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
Okay I know I said I was going to quit drinking for a while but apparently pumpkin pie flavored vodka is a thing and I will not rest until I have some.
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
