Plan B is the new Plan A
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Well I talked to some Canadians today, and I'm keeping a vigilant watch for sharks, so I'm pretty booked up.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Randomize
