His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I think he was trying to tie my clitoris in a knot with his tongue. So awful.
It's Friday the 13th and you just got boned by a guy named Jason....
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
Me and my dad hot boxed a hotel bathroom... That's what I call father son bonding
Randomize
