we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
Do you ever feel like a plastic bag?!
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Just for the record, I did not have sex in your bed. Happy 4th of July.
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
Randomize
