I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
I promise a much better performance tomorrow than last night my penis has a bed time
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...
just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
