i thought he was 22...he said he was 25..he was 19...im 26..it doesnt count if you dont know right?
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
I wish university was like frosh week all the time and then they just give you a degree for surviving
I'm just glad I met someone who probably won't punch you in the face
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
All I remember is your girlfriend laying on the bathroom floor and me crawling in and asking if it was okay to puke.
Randomize
