I developed a drinking game for WoW. Everytime I die, I take a shot.
Please get laid.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
there's no such thing as luck on your birthday, only drunken invincibility, make it happen
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
He was singing R-E-S-P-E-C-T to a stripper between motorboats while our HR manager cheered him on.
I'm on the Coaster ride of shame, currently sitting across two nice old ladies smelling like condoms.
I apparently tried to wax off my nipples.This explains the pain
This is a question I thought I'd never have to ask. How many hits of acid did you give your dad tonight?
We kept having to tell you that you couldn't just sit wherever you wanted at Walmart. Sitting in the middle of the raw meat section was unacceptable and children were staring at you.
Randomize
