i hope my daughter doesn't end up with cankles. no guy likes cankles.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Being a responsible DD does not include attempting to coordinate a 4 taxi caravan to bar #3
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
He told me I handled myself pretty well considering how drunk I was. He failed to realize that the lollipop I had was one I found on the ground a few minutes before hand.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
I found half a candy bar in my bra today... Melted to my nipple. What a mess. It was still good though.
Randomize
