I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
She's throwing herself an "I just had a baby" shower, where she makes up for 9 months of sobriety then squeezing a watermelon out of her vagina.
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Why am I cleaning the house twerking to anaconda wearing a bears jersey and helmet?
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
Randomize
