i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
