Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
He was sucking on my finger.... and it was at that moment that I thought: Man. I wish I had a penis.
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Why did I think it was so necessary to steal that rolling pin?
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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