you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Sex and the city 2 and twilight getting released in the same month. God hates mankind.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
I think he's having people over to watch him get way too drunk again
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Invited the whole bar back to my place for an after party.....shit got real with everyone seeing dad drink moonshine like a champ.
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
