p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
FYI the landlord called and plumbers will be tearing up the bathroom tomorrow. Apparently the tub is leaking into the apt below us so be sure to pee in the shower today.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
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