he sat in the bathtub shirtless yelling in gibberish for 40 minutes. funniest. stoner. ever.
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
you used progresso chicken soup as a mixer last night
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
I'm blaming hurricane Irene if I get pregnant tonight.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
you know what would be perfect? if you flew in on a horse/cat holding taco bell and then you swooped me up and took me to disney world and it was magical
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
jump out the window naked night went bad
dude pick up your phone
i cant. im high and theres a wild turkey in my backyard. wouldnt miss this moment for anything
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