you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
Who's got a bloodstream full of margaritas by 2pm? Not you, that's for sure, because you've got one of those "real" jobs.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
you made out with another girl for some wings
So I heard her yell at him and I went downstairs to find he had lit up each one of my smokes and taken just one drag off each and had em lined up on the table. She says he "experiments" when on Ambien.
Randomize
