im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
Randomize
