Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
sriracha body shots, that's gonna be a thing
it's like you just said "i want you to suffer"
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
Randomize
