My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
I told you about the baby at the graduation party that looked into my eyes and knew I was empty inside
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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