dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
He told me he had herpes after I put his hotdog in my mouth
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
I think that the winner of this years fantasy football league should get naming rights to you child
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
I walked around with red solo cups on my feet, weeds tied around my neck and a tree in my hand
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Also topless tea is a thing that happens in our apartment. Ready yourself.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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