I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
The background of my phone is you taped to the wall wearing a cowboy hat
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
wtf... you literally introduced yourself as "that friend who's going to fuck all your other friends."
I hope you know that means regardless of their gender.
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
I manage to fit my wine bottle in my koozie and the rest is history
The first thing I did in 2015 was suck a dick.....so.....
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
Randomize
