Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(248): View more from Michigan

Sooo... I woke up in the shower this morning. It was on.

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(248): View more from Michigan

the highlight of my day was when my dad called me when I was watching porn and I muted it instead of pausing it.

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(908): View more from New Jersey

he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno

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(605): View more from South Dakota

I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories

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(949): View more from California

just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.

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(858): View more from California

threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter

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(716): View more from New York

I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.

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(352): View more from Florida

If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.

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