I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
So I have exactly 420 dollars saved up in tips from the past week. I win, and I take that as a sign from god that I am allowed to use that money to buy drugs.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
remind me not to fuck anymore half bald 20 year olds. because obviously there's attachment issues
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Recycling my beer bottles from breakfast counts for earth day, right?
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I think weed is turning my hair brown
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
