can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
Note to self: do not take so many shots that you sit on the floor under the bar where nobody can see you, and reach out and grab peoples crotch.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Jus saw ur date getting a bj in the mcdonalds parking lot...u want anything?
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Randomize
