North Korea, Best Korea!
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i just got arrested. apparently dont move means dont move.
you called to congratulate me on being the reason you lost never have i ever
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
im calling her cock vulture from now on
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
if i drink i'll go into liver failure but ok
totally worth it, dude its $1 pbr
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
Randomize
