Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
He ate me out and then left in a hurry and shouted "Sorry to dine and dash" as he left my house
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
I'm deleting all the photos of dicks off my phone. This relationship could be serious
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
Ultimate cock block. About to have sex and your mom calls you so you can go help your grandmother figure out how to vote for the voice on her iPad
I was so high. I had so much hair. It was like all my hair follicles exploded.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
He’s only in town today and our afternoon sex sesh kept getting interrupted by the neighbor’s kid yelling and screaming in the pool
Randomize
