Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Did I tell you about my dream that I got handed a $100 and my vagina dissolved it? I think it wants me to not be a whore anymore.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Randomize
