He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
Am I over stepping my bounds if I ask to fuck in your new bathroom?
It has heated floors
American Eric just peed on us from the second floor. Hes now very confused as to why his "toilet is yelling." Send help.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
Just licked cheese from my hot pocket off my phone. I spilled because I was eating a Popsicle at the same time. Send an adult please
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Randomize