just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
omg... punch me in the throat... I am about to lose my mind with my parents.. I'm not saying I agree with the menendez brothers.. but I understand
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
He left his shoes, boxers and socks at my house & managed to walk home to his dorm without realizing anything was missing until 3 days after. That's the last time i'll ever hook up with a freshman.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
Pre-chapter meeting quote: "Why is there a bun literally taped to the shelf? That doesn't even make sense when you're drunk, who does that?"
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
look im sitting on my bathroom floor in my underwear snorting cocaine can we talk about this later
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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