I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
You should have seen the look on the cashiers face when I was buying steel reserve with a suit on.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You slid down a wall, tried to pull your cast off and yelled that casts were too conformist.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
how do you make "fuck me in the break room" sound casual?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
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