No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
You were crying because you hate wine coolers but you really wanted to prove you could finish it
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
‎"He's not as cute as he was last week" and "I'm not as drunk as I was last week" are basically the same sentence.
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
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