I took off my clothes and she wanted to have sex. But then she changed her mind. So we ended up fucking through her panties or something. I don't know it was weird.
I think my tv knows when im high and tells taco bell
I am currently prioritizing my hw by splitting into things i can and things i cant do drunk. Oh college
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Did you get any last night. I need to track my forever aloneness
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
Randomize
