if you like me you must not know who I am
I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
I apologize for getting really drunk, taking off my shirt, bitching someone out, crying, and breaking something at your party next weekend...
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
I asked if anyone's pants felt wet on the bottom, like a half hour after mine did. I had just peed my pants i had gotten so high no biggie
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I slept through 4/20 and my roommates bought an entire ham that's just sitting in the fridge...
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize