I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Well i tried snorting sugar. so either that made me puke or the fact that i drank water from a fish tank
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
If you didn't damage your room so much from fucking so hard we would have got more of our security deposit back
I resent that
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
I can't say "baby i'm to high to talk to you" in Starbucks.
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
Here is a brilliant idea passed on from men who have that same regret. WEAR A FUCKING CONDOM ALWAYS.
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
Randomize
