i think i have herpe
just one?
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
YES. YOU ARE GOING TO HAVE SEX WITH ME WHILE I SING LES MIS.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
Randomize
