im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
hickory dickory dock, please dont tell me about your cock
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
As much of a hooker as I am you don't slam where you drink
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
I just had sex a few hours ago now i'm eating frozen yogurt making sex plans for tonight while catching Pokémon. What a time to be alive.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
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