How do u get a lost condom out? Like really lost... up there...
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
just drunkenly made mashed potatoes at midnight. what have you done for your calorie intake lately?
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Randomize
