If I remember correctly, I may have been smoking a cigarette on the dance floor. This is the true sign of a douchebag in his native habitat...fmylife
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
you made a powerpoint titled 'things i've drank tonight' and emailed it to me.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
you were sitting on your bed looking out the window, rocking back and forth naked, saying how peaceful it looked outside
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
