The spoon I was using to ice my hickey just fell out of my purse while i was paying at the liquor store. I look like an alcoholic with a meth problem.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
Dreamt I had my own personal vibrator rep, who made house calls. I earned an upgrade to an electric model, since I was burning through batteries. That's it. Time for a bf.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
Randomize
