did you get engaged???
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
I just hit the bong during the whole bday song then blew the candles out with my exhale.
These days, you and me are swimming in dicks.
Marco
Polo
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
High school drama coach is wasted and wanted me to tell you that I’m good at flip cup and you should be very proud of me
Where the hell are you
Randomize
