I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
Seriously, I want to give you a plaque thanking you for your dedicated service to my vagina.
Thanks for the cold. I shartted and sat through a whole soccer game. James made 3 scores.
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
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