you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
Randomize
