His pickup line was "I'll eat you out"
He did it well too
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
where does the pee come out of this thing
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
