I must be too annoying 4 u.
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
He has some good qualities. Beneath the layers of asshole and fat.
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
I woke up snuggling a bottle of water while Hercules played on Netflix. Whiskey Wednesdays
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
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