How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
highlight from tonight: i hit on her and her mother.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
hold on i need to sex proof my eyelashes. thank godd for waterproof mascara
Apparently the girl he banged in the bathroom yelled at him for hitting on me all night. But whatever, he was holding her hand for most of it
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
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