bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize
