Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I THINK I JUST JOINED A GANG. PLEASE PICK ME UP.
Pretty sure that's a used tampon hanging from the tree outside my window.
That awesome feeling when you are pooping on the same toilet that nobel laureates have pooped on
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Idk man there's lots of bad dick but even a bad cookie is still pretty good
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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