how come the more i say "don't get it in my eyes," the more gets in my eyes
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Dude she was 62...with a boob job. And I'm proud to say I made out with that.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Why wake up next to a guy when you can wake up next to a bag of chips and not have to worry about what kind of std you might've caught
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
HAMMERED.. I made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich with toilet paper instead of bread...
He took a shot of vodka and AND ATE ME OUT AS A CHASER. YESSS. I AM IN LOVE.
Please tell me why I’m standing naked in the kitchen drinking pickle juice out of the jar & there is a container of potatoe salad with no lid & a spoon in it on the floor 🤦♀️
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
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