So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Woo Hoo! Just saw Asian kids with rocker mullets. Tried to get a picture on my phone, but you know how those ninjas are.
Just checked my missed calls... why did you call me 37 times from 2:14 to 3:58?
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
He wore a Medeval Times crown while I gave him a BJ
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I'm about to make existential crisis tacos.
Randomize
