idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
He's going to regret telling me he doesn't care if i shave or not...
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
We all have our weaknesses that drive us crazy. We happen to have one in common, 21 year olds. Your secrets safe. Touch his penis.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I forgot to tell you, that tinder guy literally lives 15 floors beneath me. I have been creepily saying things to him like "I see youve got a hammer on the patio"
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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