Sitting at a red light. Windows are down. I'm blasting Gaga's "Disco Stick" and doing an interpretive dance to it because I think I'm hilarious. Look to the left and see two Phi Delts that I know with their windows down. They are horrified. I am probably going to lose their Facebook friendships.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
is it true you fucked a yoga instructor last night??! ..and let me know if you want me to post that question on your facebook so kelly can see how happy you are without her
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
she was in the bathroom washing her eye makeup off with hand sanitizer.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Do you think if you have sex with a girl twin, her twin brother feels it to? Woke up at her house and they both have a look of disappointment on their faces.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
At least I'm fat on the outside. You can NEVER change being fat on the inside.
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize