Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
So I fucked that hot french guy last night
You do know he's the one who threw up on our table, right? You get to clean it up.
admittedly, it's a little weird getting relationship advice from the mother of a former one night stand. but she's a wise lady and she buys me drinks, so i'm ok with it.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
apparently I crawled into someone's bed and demanded they call me 'big dog' before shotgunning a beer
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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